rubywhiterabbit:

My little brother got into outer space and stuff so my step-mom bought him a place mat with all the planets on it. When I first saw it, I was upset, because it was newer and so Pluto wasn’t labeled. I was about to say something when I noticed something…

Pluto is there.

The artist remembered Pluto.

Guys…

The artist drew Pluto crying.

xximmaeatjooxx:

theepichumor:

averagefuture:

robert downey jr’s face was meant to be on cats okay

wakeupthesleeprs:

silly-nanners:

in the catholic ghetto, born and raised

at the playground is where I bullied most of the gays

relaxin chillaxin communion all cool

oppressing some minorities outside the school

when a couple of gays who were up to no good started making out in my friendly white neighborhood

I burned one little cross and the blacks got scared

And said “You’ll never be in the White House as long as we breathe air”

so perfect. SO PERFECT.

*collapse*

hiddlesdiddledmyskittle:

abuserr:

dekutree:

lampsarepeople2:

idiotblogger:

Helen Keller goes on a blind date

*ba dum tss*

i don’t see how this is funny

neither did she

it’s not her fault she walked into a drum kit.

whenever you feel ordinary just remember that youre the only one with that url

yourerightinthemiddleoftheroad:

andwhispers:

every book you’ve ever read is just a different combination of 26 letters

snoopdeer:

my friend lost his mobile the other day so i asked if he wanted me to phone him and he said it was on silent so there was no way of finding it and i said well if you liked it then you should of put a ring on it 

he didn’t laugh and he didn’t find his phone

ragingbomer:

ragingbomer:

so we had 3 bottles of shampoo and 0 bottles of conditioner

then mum came home excited that she bought ten bottles of conditioner on sale

it turns out she bought shampoo

now we have 13 bottles of shampoo

and 0 bottles of conditioner

here’s another fun little tidbit

the shampoo she bought is for premium blonde to sand dune coloured hair

i am your child have you ever SEEN ME WE ARE ASIAN GODDAMNIT

ierobrows:

the most depressing part of the day is watching as the sky gradually gets darker and knowing that you have done absolutely nothing productive